November 10, 2024
I've just been admitted to the hospital for the fourth time in about two months, and I haven't given an update since my first time in, so I guess I'm way overdue for one.
I've had two rounds of immunotherapy infusions, and both of them absolutely kicked my ass. The first resulted in rejection of my transplanted kidney and having to go on dialysis. First hospital stay was 7 days.
The second one caused all sorts of autoimmune responses which caused inflammation in my left lung and heart. I had a hard time walking around, had dizzy spells, coughing fits, no energy, and heavy brain fog. That put me back in the hospital, and they put me on lots of prednisone to clear it up, with the dose tapering down over two weeks. Second hospital stay was 5 days.
The tapering off of prednisone turned out to be too quick. As soon as the dose went down, all the symptoms from before came back. Back to the hospital again. Confirmed it was the same thing, plus extra lab results showed that my thyroid was involved the entire time as well, thus the low energy and by that point, I'd lost about 20 pounds in about a month. But easy for them to figure out what was going on that time because it was more of what already happened. Restart the high doses of prednisone with the taper on a much longer timeline (3 months vs 2 weeks), and add in some new meds for the thyroid and heart. Third hospital stay was 3 days.
Back today because of blood and clots in my urine for the past couple days. I've been on a blood thinner to keep my dialysis catheter clear, so I thought it could be related to that. Instead of clearing up, it got a bit worse. I was hoping it was an infection and get some IV antibiotics, couple days observation and back home. No such luck. The blood and clots are coming from my transplanted/rejected kidney, and they want to operate tomorrow to take it out. That possibility has been rolling around in my head all day, but I was hoping to avoid abdominal surgery. But it needs to go, so that's what's happening. And I already went through it in the opposite direction, so I kind of have an idea of what the recovery will be like. I'm not exactly sure how the other stuff like going and doing dialysis with a healing abdominal incision will work, but it will.
If I believed in karma, I would think my karmic bank balance should be full to overflowing. But it all just keeps coming. One thing doesn't even have the chance to resolve before another starts. I'm trying like hell to keep the attitude I've had through most of this, to take things as they come, banish the word "why" from my vocabulary, and focus on what needs to be done, and mostly succeeding (I think...). I'm tired though, all the way down to my bones and my soul.
I'll make it though. I have so far. You can get through a lot when you don't have a choice.
