August 22, 2024

Radiation treatment 30 of 30 done. They're over. I took home the mask they used to hold me still on the table. There's a little gong in the hallway you can hit to celebrate on your way out. I hit it with the mask.

I've got a few weeks of recovering ahead of me. A short while of the burns getting worse before they get better. Gradual return of the taste I've lost. Seeing how much of the hair I lost will grow back.

The second picture is me before everything. Seems like a completely different person. The third and fourth pictures show the state I'm in now. Scalped, grafted, dissected, irradiated. About half the hair on my head gone. No beard for the first time in about 25 years because a bunch of it fell out. The radiation burns on my neck and on the scars from the surgery are sore and itchy and gooey. I feel ugly and disgusting. BUT... that feeling is largely due to being very tired and run down from the radiation, and much of what I see in the mirror is going to get better. And soon I'll be in a better frame of mind to accept what doesn't.

The thing that actually matters is that the hardest parts are over with, and I'm VERY likely to make it through and hang around for a good long time after.